The Perfect Body: Facts, Myths, and a Can of Tuna

Monday, February 25, 2008

Sweeny Todd

Very very sad movie... it was amazing (for a musical). never thought i'd like shit like that, but this was very well done. There's a rhyme that sweeny todd usually repeats in the movie that just gives me chills. When you see it, you'll know what i'm talking about. Absolutely worth watching.

Hiccups

FUCKING HELL!!!! On the 13th of February I got the hiccups... very painful and the shit wouldn't stop until i took a spasm medication at night on the 14th... so, a whole day of hiccups...
Last saturday, they started again... and the fuckers won't go away... shit's giving me headaches... fuck..

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Movies

Watched two new movies this week

Rambo 4

kicked ass... nothing but blood, guts, and guy who talks with a crooked jaw. the first 30 minutes were pointless... i say skip the whole story line and just show stallone killing people. I paid BD 2.5 to see blood... and i got my money's worth!

Meet the spartans

My little brother gave me a fucked up bootleg copy of the movie... and it was a total waste of 90 minutes of my life... nothing was funny about that movie... nothing! ... fucking waste of time...
and remember, this is coming from a guy who laughs at anything!!

Sweeny Todd

haven't seen it yet... but i got the DVD at home and i'm turning it on at 7 today :) ... i hated johnny depp more than i hate tuna... but after the pirates of the carribean trilogy... i changed my mind. the guy's talented. and this movie has lots of blood... so i might like it... i don't know about it being a musical... but a gorey musical? hmmmmm.... interesting

Monday, February 18, 2008

A pro bodybuilder has recently revealed the secret to being "pro size"... the secret is out ladies and gentlemen... and here it is

"The secret is CONSISTENCY.Ask yourself this:If for a whole year, you will not miss any workouts, any sleep, any meals or any injections, what will you look like at the end of the year? Damn good, right?Now imagine doing the above for 10 years. What will you look like? Like a pro!Forget about genetics. HONEST CONSISTENCY is the answer.

Consistency will get you to pro size. Genetics will determine what you will look like."


there it is... so, if you want to be huge, you can't do it in a year or two...

and for the "fitness" guys... you won't wake up after a week of training and finding out that your arms grew 10 inches... you aren't gonna get "too big" doing that shit you call "high rep burn" training and that pathetic excuse for a diet.

there you have it.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

What the hell??? (details of the story below my comments)

I was a bit surprised when i read this, but then i thought "meh..." we should be pretty used to this since almost everyone i know believes in this "stuff" and thinks it's actually true.

the summary of the whole thing:
A woman in qurayat was sentenced to death by decapitation for SORCERY!!

This is typical, if you read the "witness" testimonies, you'd really find out that it is typical ARAB behavior. In other cultures, sorcery would turn a beautiful women into a lamb, or a prince into a frog, or some kind of crap like that. in our culture, we believe that every social problem that WE cause is a direct result of sorcery.
couple who hate each other --> sorcery
impotence --> sorcery
Chronic illness --> sorcery
car accident --> sorcery
failed at school --> sorcery

the evil eye is usually also associated with sorcery in most cases.
As i might have said before (don't remember if i did), i have witnessed this "sorcery"... and when i did, i was holding back the biggest laugh of my life. because anyone who had an ounce of intelligence would know that this is childish and retarded. if you truly believed that sorcery was real and you didn't have a doubt in your mind about it, you'd believe it no matter what.

This bullshit has now reached epic proportions. In the year 2008, they sentence a woman to death for being a sorcerer... we are moving backwards.

The lesson learned here is that if you hate someone really bad and you want him to die, plant some rotten eggs under his couch, slip some torn pages of the quran in his bathroom, and throw around some spices and shit in his living room... then call the religious police and say "HE'S A SORCERER!! HE MADE MY LEFT TESTICLE A LITTLE BIGGER THAN MY RIGHT, AND HE CAUSE THIS HUGE PURPLE MARK UNDER MY WIFE'S EYE... what... what blood on my knuckles?? ohhh... that... HE CAUSED IT!!! IT'S MAGIC!!!"... and they will take care of him for you.


Saudi Arabia: Muslim Courts Sentence ‘Witch’ to Death
Adrian Morgan

News from Human Rights Watch, BBC, The Register, All Headline News, Belfast Telegraph, International Herald Tribune, Scotsman, Agence France-Presse and Associated Press.

Saudi Arabia is busy exporting its narrow and backward version of Islam – Wahhabism – to mosques and Islamic seminaries around the world. Yet Saudi Arabia is a country where women are second class citizens, and people can be executed for witchcraft. On Friday November 2, 2007, an Egyptian pharmacist was decapitated with a sword in Riyadh after being found "guilty" of sorcery. Mustapha Ibrahim worked in Arar, a city in the north of Saudi Arabia, and was said to have tried to separate a married couple.

Ibrahim had been accused by another foreign resident of using magic to separate him from his wife. The Saudi Press Agency (SPA) then reported that "evidence" was retrieved from Mustapha Ibrahim's home. This included black magic books, a candle emblazoned with the words "to summon devils" and "foul-smelling herbs." SPA stated that Ibrahim "confessed to adultery with a woman and desecrating the Koran by placing it in the bathroom."

Mustapha Ibrahim's case was reported in April 2007, when mosque-worshippers accused him of placing copies of the Koran in washrooms, but sorcery had not then been mentioned by the Saudi media.

Though it is too late to save Mustapha Ibrahim, an illiterate woman of (apparent) Jordanian origins who is currently incarcerated in Quraiyat Prison is facing death for being a "witch." Fawza Falih was arrested in Quraiyat on May 4, 2005 by the notorious muttawa or mutaween, the religious police from the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice (CPVPV).

These men beat her so badly during her interrogation that at one stage she had to be hospitalized. She was held by the religious police at a detention center for 35 days. This, according to Human Rights Watch, violated a 1981 royal decree which forbade the CPVPV from interrogating and detaining suspects in their centers. There are 486 CPVPV centers across the kingdom, with 10,000 religious police.

Fawza Falih was convicted in April 2006 in Quraiyat in the north of Saudi Arabia of witchcraft, even though no such official crime is said to exist in Saudi law. She was convicted by Islamic clerics acting as judges, and "testimony" was provided by "witnesses." One man claimed that he was rendered impotent by Fawzah, who had cast a spell upon him. A divorced woman said that Fawzah had cast a spell and predicted that her ex-husband would come back. This witness said the man returned to her in the month that had been predicted by the woman. She was officially convicted of "witchcraft, recourse to jinn (supernatural beings), and slaughter" of animals.

A court verdict from October 10, 2006 quoted from her "confession." It read: “I take 1,500 Riyal ($400) for each act of which I send half to the magician Abu Tal'a according to the agreement, for Abu Tal'a said to me, 'If you do not bring the money, by God, you will become possessed by jinn like dogs.' " Abu Tal'a was the man who was said to have tutored her in the skills of witchcraft.

Later, Fawzah retracted her "confession" in court, claiming that it had been extracted by force. She also claimed that as she was illiterate, she had been unaware of the contents of the confession document, which she had been made to sign with her fingerprint. The contents of the confession were never, she claims, read out to her.

An appeals court ruled that as she had retracted her confession, she could not be sentenced to death "for 'witchcraft' as a crime against God." Despite this, judges in a lower court then reversed that decision, sentencing her to death on a "discretionary" basis. This was done to better the "public interest" and to "protect the creed, souls and property of this country."

She has now exhausted all legal rights of appeal.

Human Rights Watch has issued a letter to King Abdullah bin Abd al-'Aziz Al Saud, as only he now has the power to reverse the death sentence upon the woman.

The letter states that Fawzah Falih was prevented from having her son attend her court case, even though he was named as her official legal representative. After her arrest, her family had also hired a lawyer called Abdullah al-Suhaimi. The head of the CPVPV's interrogation committee refused to let this lawyer have access to her.

This is the "justice" of Saudi Arabia, and as it was enacted by Wahhabi clerics, it also displays the barbarism and lack of human rights within Wahhabi Islam. In March 2007, Sheikh Ibrahim Al-Ghaith, president of the CPVPV said: "he commission plays a large role in capturing people who practice sorcery or delusions since these are vices which affect the faith of Muslims and cause harm to both nationals and expatriates. The commission has assigned centers in every city and town to be on the lookout for these men. As for their fate, they are arrested and then transferred to concerned authorities. The commission also has a role in breaking magic spells, which are found in the sea. We cooperate with divers in this aspect. After the spells are found, they are then broken using recitations of the Holy Qur'an. We do not use magic to break magic spells, as this is against the teachings of Islam as mentioned by the Supreme Ulema. But we use the Qur'an as did the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him)."

Unaware of any irony, in October 2007 Saudi Arabia's "Human Rights Commission" announced that it would be lecturing Europe on its ill-treatment of Muslims and its "Islamophobia."

It seems never to have crossed the minds of these people that incidents such as this case against Fawzah Falih are issues that genuinely create Islamophobia.

Monday, February 11, 2008

Excerpts from the Diary of a Pissed Off Bodybuilder

Things that we do for the sake of “doing it”

I was told that there was once an experiment done on monkeys that shows how “culture” works (I don’t know if this experiment was actually done or fabricated, but it’s totally believable). They took a group of monkeys and locked them up in a cage with a water hose and a banana hanging on top of the cage. Whenever a monkey tried to climb up and grab the banana, the guy conducting the experiment would spray him with the hose until he quit. Every couple of days they’d take a couple of monkeys out and replace them with new ones. They noticed that the old monkeys grabbed the hose and sprayed the new monkeys whenever they tried to get the banana. Now, they replaced all the monkeys for new ones except one. This monkey took the hose and sprayed every damn one of them whenever they tried to get the banana. Then they all quit trying to get the banana.

The monkeys don’t know why the fuck they were preventing each other from getting the banana… they had no clue… but it’s what the monkeys before them did, and the ones before, and the ones before them… they did it for the sake of “doing it”.

This is how culture works (IMHO). Sometimes, we don’t know why the fuck we want to do things, or why we do them, but we just “have to”. For instance, marriage! In our culture, if you turn 25 (or god forbid, 30!!) and you still haven’t gotten married, there’s definitely something wrong with you. Why? the explanation “well… everyone gets married at that age… it’s human instinct”… I’m very sorry to tell you this, but that’s not human instinct. Human instinct is to mate… intercourse… “good time, sucky sucky, ten dolla”… If you tell people this, they’d say “no, but god said that’s human nature”… and then you ask them “then why did god tell man that he could have up to 4 wives?” … then they start contradicting themselves and say “well, because it’s in man’s nature to be with more than one woman.”… Anyway, I got married because I wanted to get married and I’m the kind of person that likes to settle down, so to speak. Everyone who knows me knows that I’m that kind of guy… my brother is the exact opposite… he’s 30 now and he’s not married… poor dude gets bombarded with shit like “why, are you sick?”… he just doesn’t want to get married… but people can’t understand that cuz we’ve been doing it for around forever. The funny thing is, the same people who believe that shit say things like “man, marriage is the biggest headache you can imagine.”… no shit, Sherlock!

Another thing… kids! I’m sorry but in this point in life, I don’t want any kids… not now, maybe later I’ll want some… but not now… I don’t see the point in things like “wow, life is beautiful right now, I have a gorgeous caring wife, a nice house, enough money for whatever we need… mmmm… how about I fuck it up and have a kid!!! I’m sure life will be better!” that’s just my point of view. Most people I know can’t afford a new car, then they go have a kid (willingly! Planned!! Un-planned is a different story) thinking that life will get better. This is a human life we’re talking about. People just can’t comprehend the magnitude of this crap! The only answer they have is “well, look at me, I grew up just fine.” … yeah, well, too bad the majority of the world’s population didn’t grow up like you did. I don’t know, I might be turning this into a big deal, but I don’t like to take a human life that I’m responsible for lightly. If you are retarded like me, then you are probably getting sick and tired of all the “why won’t you guys have a kid already??! People will start talking!!” well… let them talk, see if I care. Are they gonna raise the kid? No, I am. So fuck them. But I don’t say that… I say more hurtful things (to our people)… “nah… I already know how it feels to have a kid… I have a dog. Same thing”… people really seem to get pissed off when they hear this.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

I don't want to come off sounding like a narcisistic fuck over here, but in this country weighing 210 lbs at 5'7 (midget like status) and not being obese turns a couple of heads. and you get to discover a couple of weird things you never knew before:

When you're a bodybuilder...

- You discover that 99% of the clothes out there are meant to make fat people look thinner... 13 inch sleeve openings and a 60 inch chest measurement on a t-shirt isn't really what you'd call proportional measurements.

- The dress size (M) seems to keep growing year after year...

- People think it's their god given right to squeeze or poke your arm when you're standing next to them

- People think it's your job to give out diet and training programs to random people out there for free

- You discover that the indian homosexual community in saudi arabia is MUCH larger than the philipino homosexual community.

- If you go out to eat junk food, this is the usual question you'll get by the cashier or the random person walking around: "oh, so what you're eating is healthy and good for building muscles, right?"

- Walk outside of a mall, a shop, or sit in a restaurant and light up a cigarette... people look at you like you just pulled down your pants and started wiggling your pelvis (j-wad, you know what i'm talking about =D)

- If you drop something as precious as your wallet on the floor, it'll take you 20-30 minutes to convince yourself to bend over and get it... cuz either your pants will rip, your shirt will rip, you'll puke, or your head's gonna explode... Obese people can probably relate.

- tying your shoes is probably the hardest thing you've done that day.

- when people say "lunch" you start thinking to yourself "does that mean meal 3 or 4?"

- and finally, people (especially philipinos) think it's normal while you're standing in line at krispy kreme infront of about 20 or 30 people to ask you in the loudest voice they can "SIR, WHAT KIND OF STEROIDS DO YOU USE??"


Movies:
Cloverfield

that movie kicked ass!! i don't care what retarded critics think about this movie... i loved it. if you aren't gonna watch it in the movies, buy a dvd quality bootleg (cuz i know you won't buy an original copy) and hook it up to your surround sound system and crank up the volume.

The kingdom

I know, it's pretty old... seen it last week. movie was awesome. i seriously can't figure out why they banned the damn movie in bahrain and in this country. They didn't say anything bad about the country or the government... infact, it's good publicity to say that we're against terror... i guess the only problem people had with it was it made the americans look like super terror fighting heroes... i really can't take any action movie seriously these days... cuz after watching "die hard 4"... how can you take anything seriously?


i wanna watch rambo 4... when the trailer was on, my wife told me that it looks like a great movie... If my wife said that, then it's probably gonna be the best action movie of all time... it's kinda like me saying that "the note book" looks like an awesome movie...

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Excerpts from the Diary of a Pissed Off Bodybuilder

Myths and other shit

Ok, it’s time to debunk some crap that somehow became “true” due to ignorance

1-High reps light weight to get cut, Low reps heavy weight to get big

This is complete and utter bullshit. I don’t know how people came up with this conclusion, but I bet I have an idea of where it originated. Genetic freaks! Cardio is usually a bitch, and no one wants to do it (except old people who have nothing else better to do). When these freaks do high reps with light weights, it’s basically cardio… but they tend to keep all their muscle mass because… well, they’re freaks. If any other “average” or below average individual tries this, he will lose all his muscle mass, and burn a small amount of fat. It would make sense to believe that heavy weights will make you bigger, but that’s not always the case. My proof? Look at powerlifters. Benching something like 365 lbs at a body weight of 165 lbs at 6’ tall makes you strong, but not big. Basically there are two kinds of fibers that are of our concern here. One type is responsible for growth, and the other is responsible for endurance. 99% of the time, the first type responds to heavy movements at a certain rep range with lots of rest. The second responds to high repetitions, which builds endurance.
Basically, your physique is a direct result of muscle stimulus, and your nutrition.

2-If you’re a beginner, you’d best start with the machines, and then move on to free weights

I also don’t know who came up with this, but it’s definitely wrong. It’s like saying “before you learn how to drive a car, you have to learn how to play grand turismo on the playstation”. Most people will argue that it’s hard, and their arms start shaking, and they don’t have balance… blah blah blah… OF COURSE IT’S HARD!!! OF COURSE YOU’LL SHAKE!!! YOU JUST STARTED TRAINING!!! That’s how you learn stability and balance… that’s how you gain strength all over your body. If you start off with machines, then move on to free weights, you’ll still have the same problems. It’s like start off at square one again.
Not saying that you shouldn’t use machines, but I’m just saying that your lifts revolve around compound movements.

3-Don’t eat a heavy meal after 5 pm

Why? please tell me who came up with this crap! Will you turn into a gremlin if you did? The rational behind this is if you eat after 5 pm, your body won’t burn it off and you’ll store it as fat. Does your body have a time limit? Why 5 pm? That’s mid day to most people. If you know how to set up a diet and you have experience, you’d know that it is important to eat before you sleep. Look, when you sleep, what do you think your body is doing? It’s REBUILDING AND RECOVERING!!! It’s like saying “don’t charge your phone after 5 pm”… well, what if I run outta batteries at 9 pm? That’s what your body needs… a charger… FOOD!!! if you go to sleep on an empty stomach at, say, 10 pm and the last time you ate was 5 pm, you will have no calories to sustain recovery and rebuild your torn muscles.
I debated this with a friend a couple of days ago and he said “no, they meant don’t eat a HEAVY meal after 5 pm… you should eat light meals”… a bag of chips… that’s what people nowadays think is a “light snack”… shit has around 1200 cals in it… that’s not fucking light. People don’t even know what “light” or “heavy” is when it comes to food. Heavy (in most people’s minds) is when you eat a meal and feel completely stuffed and you can’t move. That’s not heavy, that’s fatal.

4-The nutritionist knows best

I don’t want to be portrayed as an arrogant ass here… but I’ve had countless people come up to me 2-3 months after following a diet that was set up by one of those scams “I’m a nutritionist, pay me $1500/month and I’ll send you the food directly to your house”, and ask for advice because they stopped losing weight 3 weeks ago… these scams are usually part of a medical organization… what they do is have one of their elite nutritionists set you up with a 1200 calorie diet from the get go… with about 100 grams of protein, 150 grams of carbs, and 20 grams of fat. Enough food to sustain life in a mouse… and they give this to a 250 lb obese person. Going from 5000 calories (a rough estimate for fat people who usually say “I can’t lose weight although I don’t eat much”) to 1200 calories will make you lose a ton of weight for a while… then you’re basically fucked, and you have to go back to your old weight, then start over. A nutritionist is nothing more than a person who got into college and said “hmmm… nutrition… I bet that’s an easy A”… no offence to nutritionists… some of them are miracle workers… but not in this country.

5-I’m sure it’s true since it’s written in the advertisement.

“500% more growth than leading whey protein brand”, 6000% faster absorption”… blah blah blah… all lies… this is an unregulated industry. A new lawsuit was filed against the company BSN (very famous supplement company) on their product “cellmass”… after testing they found that the product did NOT contain any creatine whatsoever, which explains why it tastes so good. This is a very reputable company… I wonder what the small time companies are doing? Probably putting sand in their “cookies and cream” flavored whey isolate.

6-Yoghurt and grapefruit burn fat

My mom and dad actually believed this… I tried to explain but all my mom had to say was “what? You know more than the doctor does?”… so, I used my cunning skills to convince them… by cunning skills, I mean making fun of them whenever I see yoghurt on the table say “here, eat this, you’ll be thin in no time… BWAHAHAHAH”….
For the retards who still believe this crap… if you have a glass that’s filled half way with water… now, you pour some what in it, does the water in the glass decrease?

7-Bodybuilding at a young age will make you short

The rational behind this is, if you lift weight for 3 hours per week, your spine won’t grow and whatever… and people usually believe that…
Let me tell you this, how many fat kids you know grew up to be fat adults at 6’ tall or more? I have 8 friends… life long members in the “I love me some ribs” club. All of them are taller than 5’10. these people carry around 20-150!!! lbs of extra weight that affects their spine 24 HOURS PER DAY!!! If that didn’t make them short, I guess 3 hours of weight training per week will make them short… I guess that’s why Arnold schwarisla,dngalsdhjrwerewnigger started lifting at the age of 13 years old and he’s… what? 5’2??? 5’1??... ohhhh, right… he’s 6’2.

8-bodybuilding makes you sterile

No… using steroids at a very young age (13-19) MIGHT… AND I REPEAT… MIGHT!! Make you sterile. Bodybuilding will make you a lot more fertile than being a fat fuck.



Well… that’s all I could think of for now… if you have anymore myths about bodybuilding, fitness, and nutrition, just post’em in the comments section



Are women trying to turn into skeletons?

I don’t know, man… I was talking to someone on a forum and he told me that most women in the UK want to look like this:






And judging from the current trend of Tara Reid, Nichole Richie, Hillary Duff… etc… I see them portraying these whores in the media as “beautiful and fit”… WTF???

This is for the women… is this true?? Cuz if it is, you’re goddamn crazy!!!

Saturday, February 02, 2008

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
THIS IS PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
one of my friends sent me this link
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5KmIXZM-V8

and the title was "shaikh explains the difference between men and women"
i don't have any speakers or headphones in the office because i'm too lazy to bring some, bend over under my desk, rip my pants, and plug them in... so, i immediately replied back and said "dude, what's he saying... i don't have speakers!"
then i clicked the link and saw english subtitles... then i sent back to my friend and said "never mind, it's transelated... just opened it... need to think before i send" then i watched the video...
if you opened the link you'd know why my friend had this answer
"
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

You just completely disproved what he was talking about!"



HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHHA