Excerpts from the Diary of a Pissed Off Bodybuilder

First off, this is gonna be a long ass post. i'll be talking about shit ranging from personal progress to the flaws in the atkins diet and how everyone went wrong on that shit.

What i've been up to in the past 4 weeks

Well, as you know, i've decided to quit the contest after they delayed the contest date til after ramadhan. I pigged out for a whole week and gained about 16 lbs (or something like that... i don't remember exactly). After that i just said F*** it!! i've been doing most of this to be personally satisfied by my progress first, then winning a contest second. so, i went back on a low carb diet for 2 weeks, where i did cardio almost twice a day/ 5 days per week. My calories averaged out at around 2200 calories per day at that time. last week, I've decided to go into ketosis (we'll talk about ketosis and the atkins diet later on) to burn that last bit of fat that was left. Let me tell you, it was very effective. BUT! i'd rather die than go through that shit again. i could barely work out. I felt as week as hell. No pumps, no strength, i felt like i was gonna puke after every set, i start to black out after long sets... it was just unbareable. nonetheless, it was very very effective at fat burning. Ofcourse, by wednesday, i was extremely depleted and i haven't had a drop of glycogen left in me. So, i wanted to try to load up (shitload) while shedding as much water as i could. All through the week i drank 1.5 gallons of water and increased it by 2 liters every other day while increasing my sodium intake. I was pissing like a race horse by sunday. Then, at 7 pm on wednesday i cut off my water intake and started loading on "shit". a box of hostess cupcakes, mcdonalds, oats and honey, chocolates, pop tarts, donuts... all kinds of good stuff... but the shitty part was that i couldn't drink anything. now, i wouldn't tell you any of this if it worked like i planned :) ... i woke up thursday morning as soft as a baby's ass! i was retaining water like a mother f***er! but i was full and loaded... i still need to practice my water depletion and carb loading to get it right... but i'll leave that to a later time (in 6-8 months inshallah). i weighed at around 186 lbs on thursday morning, full of water, and still holding a little fat under the belly and in the love handles (i can't get rid of that shit no matter how hard i try!!!!... next time, i'll seek professional help)

in this last picture, you can see how much freakin' water i was holding... looked like chocolate with veins on it :S

Loose skin

I think you all know my take on loose skin, right? i believe that most people who say they have "loose skin" don't. It's mostly a lot of fat without any muscle to hold it up, and the skin won't shrink cuz it's filled with fat. Well, when i was depleted, i took a picture on tuesday night to show you how loose skin looks like. my arm measurement at its largest was at around 17.2, and when i depleted it was around 16.25 inches. so, in a couple of days it went down around a whole inch. so, the skin doesn't have time to shrink around it... i took pictures :) ... here's skin around my arm, and my abs... as you can see, it isn't filled with anything (except for a little water) and this is how it looks like






Devils eggs and all the good stuff

This is just for people who are dieting :P ... i just wanted to share my thursday breakfast with everyone here... some buttermilk pancakes, syrup, and mmmmmm delicious peanut butter cookies. you just dip those suckers in some nutella and you're in heaven!!!

Now, i'd like to talk about a serious issue. those f***ing custard filled munchkin sugar donuts at dunkin... i refer to them as devil's eggs because that's what they are. i am 110% sure that the devil himself made these little bitches to kill people. every other thursday i go and get me a fifty count of these eggs and eat aout 15-20 of'em every two hours or so. after eating 15-20 munchkins, my stomach says "ok dude... i'm full"... so i stop... 20 minutes later, bacteria in my gut go "OK BOYS!!! GET TO WORK!!" and my gut gets so bloated... my god! ... if i stand up, and try to arc my back, i feel like my bellybutton is gonna shoot out... no kidding. ofcourse, being the moron that i am, i eat another serving 2 hours later... and the cycle continues until i look like i'm pregnant. now, each one of these little bitches has 10-15 grams of carbs, 1 gram of protein, and 2-3 grams of fat. So, that's about 60-80 calories each. eating 20 of these would be 1200-1600 calories... YUM YUM!!!




Super Size Me

Have you seen this movie? i've seen it twice, and i watched it for a third time this last thursday. What the f*** was this guy trying to prove? that McDonalds is bad for you? no shit!!! we all know that Mcdonalds is bad for you... almost everything we eat is bad for us. let's see, if i tell you that lean beef is bad for you, would you believe me? if i told you that tuna is bad for you, would you believe me? if i told you that veggies were bad for you, would you believe me? all those things are bad for you IF YOU CUT OUT EVERYTHING ELSE AND ONLY EAT THAT ITEM!!! If i said "hey, i'll prove that eggs are bad for you... i'll eat nothing but 30 eggs everyday, and nothing else to prove it." that's just stupid. nothing wrong with eating mcd's once, twice, or hell, three times a week! but eating it everyday, 3 times a day, for a whole month? come on.
but, something that really caught my attention was the liver enzyme values (especially ALT values)... now, i've seen liver values for people who use oral steroids moderately, and people who are heavy users (probably the biggest fear people have when using oral steroids is liver failure)... the values ranged from 70-160... now, this guy ate mcdonalds all day, AND HIS VALUES SHOT UP TO 260!!!! WTF!?!?!?!?
The worst thing about that "documentary" was that one of his points to prove is that fast food restaurants are huge contributers to the obesity problem in the united states. bullshit. Obesity is caused by people who can't control their urges and desires... some people have urges to smoke, some to drink, and others to eat. I swear to god almost every severely obese person i know says "i dont' know why i'm fat... i don't even eat"... and when they say they don't eat, they mean they only eat one meal a day... FINE!!! that meals isn't your biggest problem... your problem is f***ing SNACKING!!! you see them drinking sodas, eating candy, munching on donuts, and they think those things have no calories... they probably eat 3000 calories worth of crap without even knowing it!!! and to top it off, they eat a 2000 calorie meal. so that's 5000 calories... WHEN THEY THINK THEY DON'T EAT!!!
let's see... this is what i usually see people do... candy bar, soda, juice, tea with sugar, coffee with sugar, cheese sandwich, candy bar, energy drink, chips, meal at mcdonalds or some other junk restaurant... please add that up... and tell me you don't eat.
When you see someone who has cholesterol problems that run in his family and catching up to him, and you see him eating lots of fatty foods and he doesn't exercise, what do you say to him? EXACTLY!! you say "hey, you need to watch what you eat or you'll die!!! atleast get some exercise"... when you see someone who is prone to lung cancer and smokes two packs a day, what do you tell him? ... NOW when you see someone who was "born fat", what do you say? "miskeen, 3inda mashakil. he needs medical help." .... no... he needs to f***ing diet. when you are born with something, it's an early warning... but you choose to neglect it and not care and just say "i was born this way"... my wife stopped believing in "he's fat because he was born like that"... becuase she knows i was born a fat ass, turned into a skinny pencil neck (weighing 132 lbs, soaking wet) and now i'm at less than 7% weighing 194 lbs. so, being born that way is just an excuse. I could easily say that the last bit of fat i have on my waist is "genetic" and "i was born that way" and it won't go away... hell, it'll give me piece of mind.. but i know it's not true... and i know i'm doing something wrong... so i try... and i try... and i try... unlike people who "tried everything" and when you ask them to name the last 10 things they tried, they go "ummmmmmm....ummmmm.... i tried not eating for a day! but that didn't work"... if you don't want to "try" seriously, you'd better accept the way you look and not try to create excuses to change it. and when someone asks you why aren't you trying to lose weight? say "because i don't want to"... also, accept the health, and the social consequences that come with it. people like that, i have no problem with. it's the people that say "you're wrong... i tried everything and i can't lose fat" ... or.. "the nutritionist helped me lose 50 lbs in 2 months... she also gave me a reccomendation to see this plastic surgeon about all this loose skin"... two months later "I gained 60 lbs cuz i stopped seeing the nutritionist"... no, you gained 60 lbs cuz you're stupid.

The Atkins diet, and where we went wrong

I'll be truthful here. I've only read about 20 pages of that atkins crap and then threw the book away. reading those 20 pages made me feel like i had coronary disease. Nonetheless, the whole diet is based on ketosis ( i hope). you see, when you go into ketosis you start producing ketones that use fat as the body's primary fuel cuz there's no glucose to burn. this process is a bit muscle sparing, and burns fat like crazy. But, uptil now, i haven't seen anyone go into ketosis correctly. i mean, if i'm wrong and the atkins diet wasn't based on ketosis and it was just low carb and shit... you'd be better off going on the "throw your guts up bolemic diet from hell!"... cuz you'll get the same results... severe muscle loss. AND THAT'S WHY MOST OF THE PEOPLE WHO GO ON ATKINS LOSE A SHITLOAD OF MUSCLE AND HAVE THAT STUPID "LOOSE SKIN"... how the f*** would you know if you went into ketosis or not? let me make this clear and put it up into points:

1- the human body is very efficient into converting protein to glucose in the absence of carbohydrates. the efficiency is almost 56% (meaning more than half of the protein you eat CAN turn into carbohydrates.
2- you have to eat just that right amount of protein your body needs. anything more will convert to glucose as stated above.
3- a minimum of 60% of calories should come from pure, yummy fat. that's a lot of fat.
4- if you do not know any advanced procedures to go into ketosis, it'll take around 3 days to start ketosis IF YOU USE MUSCLE DEPLETING WORKOUTS. if not, it'll take about a week.
5- knowing that, if you take in more than 20 grams of carbohydrates, you will shoot out of ketosis and have to do it all over again.

since we got that out of the way, let's look at point no.3. what do most people on atkins eat when it comes to fat? THEY EAT THE WORST KINDS OF FAT IN EXISTANCE!!! saturated, processed fat. When i went into ketosis, i had to eat a minimum of 95 grams of fat... only 35 of those were saturated (egg yolks). the rest were either mono, or poly unsturated (canola mayo, or fish oil). even when around 60% of my fat intake was very healthy fat, i felt like my heart was gonna explode!!! and i remember in the atkins book, it said that there is no evidence that this diet is bad for the heart... MY HAIRY ASS IT ISN'T!!!

anyway, the main point i'm trying to come across is HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT YOU'RE IN KETOSIS?! i know that a lot of people have tried the atkins diet... how many of you went to a pharmacy and bought some ketostix before going on the diet? yeah :) ... just as i thought... none of you. you know, the ketogenic diet was here long before dr. fatkins showed up. and it was very efficient. bodybuilders from the 50's and 60's used it. and when they tried to explain it to people, people actually laughed at them. :) ... crazy crazy world... ofcourse, those bodybuilders used ketostix (developed for diabetics) to make sure they were in ketosis. you piss on the stick, and it shows a color. that color determines if you have glucose coming out with your piss, or ketones... and the more you go into ketosis (more ketones released in the body) the darker the color appears on the stick.

Now, i've done a lot of experimenting on this and i've been pissing on those sticks about 4 times everyday (i know some advanced methods of going into ketosis, so i had time)... i've realized that the more fat i ate, the more ketones i produced, and the more protein i ate, the less ketones i produced... so, if you don't count grams or calories of fat and protein... you're basically f***ed... other than the fact that about half the people i know who went on the atkins diet don't even know what carbohydrates, protein, or fats are... aahhh f***... who am i kidding? almost all of them don't know what they are!!!

anyone who wants to try this, please email me and i'll work with you on it... but bare in mind... you'll feel worse than shit on this diet... and you'll look like ass... but when you're done and you fill up on carbs... you'll look really good ;)