Excerpts from the Diary of a Pissed Off Bodybuilder

The loop

It seems like every couple of months, I hear the same lame things from different people. Since I’m in a happy mood when I’m at the gym these days (I’m bulking… and I get to eat my kitkat everyday), I don’t mind resting longer between sets and chat with people whenever they wanna talk about something. So, this guy at the gym starts talking about how he used to be thin, had a six pack, and all the girls were begging him to go out with them… you know, usual bullshit. And then he starts talking about how he and all his Saudi friends used to get all the attention from the girls in the clubs when he was in the states. I just played stupid and said “I’m sure it’s because all of the muscles and definition you guys had.” … he said “no, man. There are always these huge dudes with muscles in clubs but the girls don’t want them… they want Saudis… you know why? Because when they dance with Saudis they can feel how hard their “member” gets when they rub against them.” … Another stereotype about how every woman in the world only wants a penis because they’re all dirty bitches. I really don’t know how some people are obnoxious enough to say something like that to someone they don’t know. I find it extremely offensive that this guy thinks that I’m stupid enough to like his conversations. Later on that workout, I was using some heavy weights on the leg press machine… so this guy comes up to me and says “man… I don’t know how some people think… it’s not how much weight you use that makes a muscle grow… it’s all in the technique (meaning form)” … I just said “yeah… you’re right… why don’t you go grab some 20 lb dumbbells and do some curls with perfect “technique” and tell me when your arms hit the 20 inch mark.” … I don’t know what goes through their heads when they say something like that… The only time I ever step up to someone to talk is when I see a friend and I just say hi, or if someone is gonna hurt himself real bad by doing stupid exercises (like this one guy who kneels on the floor, straps a weight belt to his forehead, connects it to the cable machine and pulls with his fucking neck) I just say “hey man… watch out… that shit could get you injured.” … sometimes I don’t say shit because I know they aren’t gonna listen.
I know I’ve talked about this before, but I swear it happened again yesterday… I was walking out of work to my car and one of the other unit’s supervisors was behind me and yelled “what the hell is this?” (the plant alarms went off real loud and the whole sky was filled with dust from the fucked up weather we have)… so I said “I don’t know… I usually hear an alarm at 3:30 but never this loud…” so he says “take it easy on the muscle, son” … I told him I’ll take it easy when I’m a bit older… so… you guessed it… he said “when I was your age, I was twice your size, full of muscle, no fat, 32 inch waist. I used to wear the largest shirts I could find but still… when I do this (and then he tried to hit a most muscular pose… which looked like he was giving his imaginary friend a bear hug) the shirt would rip in half.” … I could not hold myself back… I laughed so hard I almost fell to my knees. Now this guy is around 6’-6’2, nothing less than a 50 inch waist, very skinny arms and legs, he kinda looks like a much taller version of that actor in batman begins… the crooked cop with the long hair… when he gave that most muscular pose and said his shirt ripped… man… I haven’t laughed like that since I saw madea goes to jail!!! Anyway, I just played stupid again and said “wow… you know, you look like a big guy who used to workout… what happened?” he said… the typical answer “I got older and quit training and all the muscle turned into fat.”

Same story… just different people in different places…

I’M GOING ALL OUT, BABY!!!!

Well… I’m not training under phil’s guidance anymore… I think it’s time to experiment some more… phil taught me more than I could learn on my own in a lifetime. We was such a great help, but I still need to learn and try new things. His theories on ratios and training are the fundamental blocks of what I’m planning for this year. Since I’m doing all of this on my own now, I’ll post my diet. Phil doesn’t support the number of calories I’m taking in, but from my own experience, that’s how I gain more muscle (and more fat). I have 8 weeks to hit anywhere between 220-230 lbs, and I’m getting pretty close (207 lbs this morning). So, without further ado, here’s what I’m eating at the moment.

5:15 am
400 ml super milk
4 scoops mass factor weight gainer
1 scoop whey protein
1 chunky caramel kitkat bar… (shut up!)

9:00 am
300 grams of 90% lean beef (it’s a bit leaner cuz it’s cooked on the foreman) made into two burgers with 2 slices of fat free cheese on jumbo buns (sometimes white, sometimes whole wheat… depends on availability)
1 apple

12:00 pm
Same as above

4:45 pm (pre workout)
1 scoop whey protein in water… sometimes I skip this meal all together for no reason…

6:00 pm
500 ml calcium enriched white grape juice
400 ml super milk
3 scoops whey protein

8:00 pm (or 9 or 10 or whenever)
300 grams of chicken breast cooked in 1.5 tbsp olive oil
Big ass bowl of salad

If I ever have time to go out with the mrs or with my friends to eat, I wouldn’t think twice about it :) … last year I didn’t have much fun with my wife and my friends when it came to dinning outside the house… this year… I’m gonna have fun whenever I can…

The total calories are around 4500… 400+ grams of protein… around 440 carbs… and about 92 fat. I will add 500 cals to this diet every 2-3 weeks…