Excerpts from the Diary of a Pissed Off Bodybuilder


Health has nothing to do with it!

Since I’ve started all this crap (diet and training and whatever), I’ve been criticized for “going against doctors, and nutritionists information” to achieve my goals. You know the drill, right? “too much protein isn’t good for the bones and kidneys”, “supplements will give you cancer”, “creatine will give you kidney failure”, “heavy weight training causes injuries”… blah blah blah. And recently I have been criticized for “implying” that if you don’t do it my way, you’re not doing it right. Let’s get one thing straight, WHAT I DO AND WHAT I PREACH IS NOT F***ING HEALTHY!!! Yes, it is way healthier than most people’s lifestyles… but this is in no way going to make you live longer or healthier or whatever. If eating junk, smoking, drinking alcohol, not exercising, whatever, decreases your life span by 20%... what I do might decrease it by 5%... this is just an example, as always I have to explain to idiots that these aren’t exact numbers and they’ve just been pulled out of my ass.
Now, what I want you to do is think about this for a second… what is health? Is it living longer? Is it maintaining bodily functions for the longest time possible? Is it trying to stay happy and depression free for the longest time you can? Is it trying to enjoy life? WHAT THE F*** IS HEALTH? You cannot control health, unless you are IN A CONTROLLED ENVIRONMENT!!! If you’re locked up in a room, with no outside interference, then you can judge what’s “healthy” for you or not (if you think healthy means living longer). Because as Red Foxx said: “a friend of mine quit smoking… said he didn’t want to waste his life… 2 days later he got hit by a tobacco truck and died.” Personally, I think health is overrated. Way way way way way overrated. Because you never know what’s going to happen. BUT!!!!! This doesn’t mean you should throw your life away. You want to smoke cigarettes? Fine… smoke… just don’t smoke 2 packs a day and expect to live past 50. You want to eat junk? Fine… eat junk… just don’t make it your primary source of nutrition. Because stressing yourself over something that’s supposed to help you live longer (like not eating junk, or quitting whatever) will only cause your body to release catabolic hormones that’ll mess it up even more. People are going f***ing crazy over health issues. “this increases the risk of cancer” “this fights cancer, buy it!” “this’ll make you live longer… research says so… now go buy it” “soy is healthy (WHICH TURNED OUT TO BE THE BIGGEST SCAM EVER!!!!)... buy it and quit drinking milk”… it’s all “this is good for your health… buy it”… and… SUB7AN ALLAH!!! The healthiest thing you can ever do… the only thing proven to lower bad cholesterol and raise good cholesterol (naturally… not a medication), regulate blood pressure, stimulate the heart, stimulate your whole body… endless health benefits… THAT’S ABSOLUTELY FREE…. AND NO ONE FREAKING DOES IT!!! IT’S CALLED SLEEP EARLY, WAKE UP EARLY, AND GO FOR A F***ING WALK!!! I’m not talking morning cardio or whatever… I’m talking walking… just walk… 4, 5, hell, 10 miles a day… who cares… just f***ing walk. DO YOU DO THAT???? DO DOCTORS DO THAT??? DO NUTRITIONIST DO THAT??? If so… I don’t see them when I get up in the morning… I only see 4 people from 4-6 am when I do morning cardio. And I will make this a habit for life… 5 times a week… why? Cuz it actually makes me feel good.
Really, health has become a business. And really, from now on, I will take a shit on any piece of medical research I find. Because the “latest” research shows that.. and I quote: “overweight people live longer than slightly overweight people”… what the f*** is that? They gave up on fat people. They’re like “f*** it!! Let’s tell’em it’s ok to be fat… we can sell them more food… they get sick… they buy medicine… and when they get old and they can’t have sex anymore… we’ll sell them steroids for 100 times the street price and we’ll call it hormonal replacement therapy… we’ll say that it’s different than steroid use so we won’t lose business… but the stupid f***ers won’t know it…oh yeah… and let’s bring the punishment for steroid distribution to 25 years in prison… so no one can f*** with our business” seriously… what the hell happened? Rape… you get 4 years in prison… you have steroids that’ll last you more than a week, and that classifies you as a dealer and you go to prison for 25 years. HRT (hormonal replacement therapy) goes for about $2000 for 150-250 mg of testosterone per week (a beginner steroid cycle dose)… on the street, it goes for $16. who should go to jail? Oh, and you can get a prescription for HRT when you’re over 40 and you have declining test levels… you don’t get rejected. (and just for your info, 150-250 mg/wk IS A LOT OF F***ING TEST!!... good testosterone levels in young men are around 70 mg/wk, that’s when they peak…)

You want health? Listen to the words of our prophet (peace be upon him)

The prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him) has encouraged us to use everything moderately. Yes, that includes food, exercise… etc. If you overdo, or under do anything, it will negatively affect your health.

I do not preach health

What do I preach? BODY F***ING BUILDING!!! No one ever came to me and said “I want to be healthier, what should I do?”… people always ask “I wanna lose the belly”, “I want to build muscle”, “what are the best protein sources”, “can I eat this and that if I want to lose body fat?”… hey… that rhymed :) … anyway, that’s what they ask me and that’s what I preach. The problem I have with most people is that when I tell them what they should do to achieve their goals, they say “no, that’s not how it should be done”… well f*** you! Why did you come to me in the first place? I’ll tell you why, because you tried every stupid fad diet out there and you never exercised and you thought it was gonna be easy and it won’t take time to burn off all that fat you’ve accumulated over 15 years. I will tell you everything except what you want to hear. You have to eat tasteless food (if you don’t know how to cook) and you have to f***ing move your ass and workout. And the best part is that you don’t lose shit… yeah that’s right. I won’t give you that “you’ll lose 30 lbs in 30 days” shit. I’ll tell you “listen, if you’re losing more than 2 lbs per week MAXIMUM!!! You aren’t doing it right. You have to go slower”. Ofcourse, that’s why I’ll fail miserably if I open up a gym. No one wants to hear that. I have a friend of mine that came to me last week and said “I want you to give me another program… I stopped the program you gave me about 6 months ago… I want a new one”… I asked him “you haven’t worked out in 6 months, or dieted, and you want another program? Didn’t that program work for you?” … just to let you know, when he was on it, he was losing 2 lbs per week, and lost about 20 lbs, total. So he says “yes, it worked fine… but I want something faster”. I told him that he knew he shouldn’t lose more than 2 lbs per week, and if it’s not broken, don’t fix it. Yet, he still wanted to “lose fat faster”… I just told him he can’t lose FAT faster… he’ll only get smaller and flabbier. Then he told me that he works extended hours at work and it was hard to plan meals… so I told him to keep a couple of cans of tuna in the office, and whenever it’s meal time, he just pops one real quick (he wants to be an ass about meals, I’ll be a bigger ass). He just smiled and said “come on man… gimme a break”… I said “ok. Let me get my magic wand, tap it twice on my testicles, then once on your head… and bam!! You’ll have a six pack.”
Izzibda, fad diets are just that… FAD DIETS!!! If you work hard, it’ll show on your body… if you don’t, it will also show. If you want to talk about how to get fit and burn all that fat and get defined, I’ll be more than glad to help. If you want to talk about being “healthy”, I won’t talk about that cuz that ceiling fan is gonna fall on your head and your health will go “bye-bye”

Note: if you’re wondering about the soy scam.. please visit www.thewholesoystory.com