malaysia... take 3

you know how i love plane rides...




the fruit farm was nice... we saw lots of Jamaican thingies...








The tour guide, Old fart McNoteeth, overused the words "dekula" and "haish"... you had to be there to get it








we had lots of fun... except for the mosquwai6oos and this helicoptor






The thing is as big as ruffles' nut sack!!! and that's fucking huge!!!

and ofcourse... how can we leave the fruit farm without seeing my favorite fruit (which i didn't know that it produces one fruit per tree per 9-12 months!!!) the pineapple!!!




Look at da dooogy!!!! in'he cute???? :)




LET'S GO SEE SOME MONKEHS!!!!!




the park is called "monkey park"... AKA botanical gardens... i was so excited to see my relatives... i searched and searched... didn't find shit!!!.... went back to the car and the driver said "no monkey, right?" i was like WTF dude!!?? he said that they shot them all cuz they were attacking people and shit... and he couldn't tell me that before we went??? I guess he wanted the extra money for the drive...

i was sad and was looking for happiness at the bottom of the bottle :(





Then i discovered that i was famous in this damn place :)
can you spot the retard?






Badger badger badger badger... snaaaaaaayyyyyyykkkkkk snaaaaayyyyykkkk




the next day we decided to go down to the beach... the weather was gorgeous as you can see










The waves were pretty strong. mariam and i were walking on the shore and this huge wave smacked us and dragged away mariam's sandals... so, i tried to seduce them to come back to shore




nice scenery though



and the massage.... god it was awesome!!!




and then fuds




The night market was nice... it's nice just to walk around and look at shit















The night market is just random stores that are stuck to each other on a street that extends about 500 meters... it's nice for gifts and t-shirts and shit...and it's a good waste of time. besides, it's right outside the door of the hotel :)

Then we went down to kuala lumpur




and no... this picture is not because i hate flying (which i do)... the plane was full of abnoxious, rude, retarded, and uncivilized arabs (about 90% of the airplane was occupied by idiots from the arabian gulf. mostly saudis and kuwaitis), the family which consists of a mother, father, maid, and 1827 children behind us were this close to driving me on a killing frenzy... they had about 7 infants and they were all crying... suddenly there was this god awful smell, we peaked back and they were fucking changing the baby's diaper in the middle of the plane.
word of advice... if you see a plane filled with arabs, get out...
oh, and btw, i wasn't an arab over there... LOL!!! my wife and i agreed that she was american and i was from the trinidad... no one knows where the fuck that is (not even me. LOL!! I kept telling them it was south of india and they said "yeah!! i htink i know where that is!" just discovered that it's right on top of venezuala...) it was fun. we only spoke english and it's nice to hear what arabs say in the elevator and restaurants when they think you aren't arab and talking loud about you in arabic.



This is the pyramid mall and the pyramid hotel... we stayed here for a couple of nights... it was really awesome.. it's nice to spend 2 or 3 nights here cuz the waterpark is right next to it (i'm talking a 30 second walk) and the mall is awesome and there's a ton of shit to do... and if you're into the night life and shit, this is where to go.








Shrimp soup, shrimp bbq, shrimp gumbo...













I also taught my wife about the 3 steps of shutting a woman up...
step 1



step 2



step3




and swing

here are some pics from sunway lagoon (themepark)







there was some rape going on in the animal park






then i found my best friend... jawad.



I had a little fight with him and they put me in time-out...





then it's down to china town!!










then it's down to bukit bintang!! kinda like downtown kuala lumpur







booze, bitches and rock n'roll baby!!!



MORE FUDS!!!!




What pancakes????


They have a shit ton of nice malls there... but one of them has a huge amusement park and an imax theatre

this stuff is HEAVEN!!!! this is probably the reason i put on 2 inches on my waist while i was there




Your tattoos... show me dem






The chocolate factory is a very nice place to help you get fat and to get gifts for your loved ones to make them fat also... so, according to the theory of relativety, you won't change in size...





"babe, go start the car... this shit's expensive... i'm gonna make a run for it"




On the last day... we went a got a little fishy massage where fish eat you alive...







Finally... we got on the plane and were attacked by ninjas..





Well... it's back to work i guess... and start dieting in the end of september for a new season...